Project Gold Star has been designed as a continued process of Social Enlightenment through my own autobiographical re-telling of my
life experience as the Gold Star Daughter of a National Hero, Bruce Alan
Grandstaff, posthumous recipient of the Congressional Medal of Honor. My role is to reveal the reality that the
sacrifices of war are shouldered by our country’s military children as a
trickle down effect, yet our country has been ill-prepared to provide a supportive environment for these children. I believe it is an overwhelming injustice that falls to these children who shoulder the responsibility of our country’s emotional war wounds,
mostly alone, for the remainder of their lives.
Through my personal life experience and the history of my father’s heroism, I am provided the privilege of sparking awareness to cast a light on this dark, historically invisible cost of
war by revealing our population of nearly 4 million Military Children and Children of our Veterans living in every community across this country, each with the potential for sacrifice. I suggest that to improve resilience, we must
address bio-psychosocial factors that will foster
post-traumatic growth of the individual child who experiences a stressful
tragedy of this magnitude.
The experience of parental death to war is so far
beyond the realm of the norm, the qualia of the experience is un-relatable to
both adult military personnel and the civilian world. The child may experience sudden displacement,
as well, if there are custodial issues.
As such, it is imperative for wellness that avenues of recovery and
resilience are made available as a part of the national upbringing to the
historically invisible population of Gold Star Children who lose a parent to
war and for military children who experience the physical and psychological
challenges a parent may face upon returning home with a post-war traumatic
injury. Resiliency is a key element and
it can be logically reasoned that it is crucial to combat the effects of
childhood trauma or complicated grief in which both the government and private
sector can play important roles in minimizing the burden carried by the
children of our warrior protectors. The death of a parent to war qualifies as a
traumatic experience that has lasting effects that may take years before fully
realized. Americans must commit to this
social change. The abandonment of these
children can no longer be tolerated and a social readjustment must be
facilitated. This is not only a moral
consciousness issue, but our country will experience economic future effect
with long-term ramifications. Validation
of the child’s experience is the first step.
There is minimal social acknowledgement of parental death to combat,
although for the child, the losses are felt deeply, personally, socially, and
physically. Children have no language of
loss nor do they have words to express what they are feeling. The comfort of the social network or support
system can make a difference in a child’s perception of a devastating life
experience.
